Longmont Potion Castle 12 (2016)
Track 9: LPC 12 Medley 2
Last modified: 2025-02-11T20:56:17
Model used: distil-whisper/distil-large-v3
Speakers adjusted? false
Subtitles adjusted? false
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1 --
None: Hello?
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2 --
SPEAKER_02: Hi, I'm up at the food bank.
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3 --
SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
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4 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm supposed to ask if you can use a spork on turduck and...
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5 --
SPEAKER_00: What's that?
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6 --
SPEAKER_02: Which one?
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7 --
SPEAKER_00: Who gave you my number?
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8 --
SPEAKER_00: A volunteer?
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9 --
SPEAKER_00: A volunteer?
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10 --
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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11 --
SPEAKER_00: Gave you a number.
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12 --
SPEAKER_00: Ah, I think you got the wrong number.
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13 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm down and dirty Rufus.
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14 --
SPEAKER_00: I don't know who's down and dirty Rufus is.
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15 --
SPEAKER_02: Will you make a cash donation, please?
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16 --
SPEAKER_00: No. How do you all mean to make one now?
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17 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm down-and-dirty Rufus.
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18 --
SPEAKER_00: I don't know who's down-and-duty Rufus if.
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19 --
SPEAKER_02: It's me.
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20 --
SPEAKER_00: I don't know who you are.
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21 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm telling you right here.
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22 --
SPEAKER_03: NBS electronics.
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23 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you guys got pitch pipes up there?
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24 --
SPEAKER_03: No, I don't sell that kind of stuff at all.
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25 --
SPEAKER_02: It's for a guitar.
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26 --
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I understand what it is.
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27 --
SPEAKER_03: This is an amp repair shop.
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28 --
SPEAKER_03: I don't do that kind of stuff.
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29 --
SPEAKER_02: I play for Down and Dirty Rufus, and we got a gig coming.
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30 --
SPEAKER_03: You know, if you think I don't recognize your voice.
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31 --
SPEAKER_03: is you're barking up the wrong tree.
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32 --
SPEAKER_03: So why don't you just stick it up your ass?
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33 --
SPEAKER_02: It sounds like you're on a crack pipe.
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34 --
SPEAKER_03: Fuck off.
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35 --
SPEAKER_02: Hello?
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36 --
SPEAKER_02: Yes, it's Carl. Hello.
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37 --
SPEAKER_02: Carl.
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38 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm a web designer. I just moved in here.
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39 --
SPEAKER_06: Hey.
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40 --
SPEAKER_06: Get the fuck out of your, Carl.
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41 --
SPEAKER_06: Don't call me.
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42 --
SPEAKER_02: Do me a big favor.
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43 --
SPEAKER_02: Rub my back for a little while.
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44 --
SPEAKER_02: It's real sore.
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45 --
SPEAKER_02: Hello?
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46 --
SPEAKER_02: Hi, I'm Shrobel from Zatarans, Rice.
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47 --
SPEAKER_04: I have no idea who you are and what you want.
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48 --
SPEAKER_04: You want to tell me?
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49 --
SPEAKER_02: Zatarans, the rice cooker?
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50 --
SPEAKER_02: I know nothing about it.
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51 --
SPEAKER_02: Real spicy.
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52 --
SPEAKER_04: Well, sorry, I'm not interested.
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53 --
SPEAKER_02: But I have a note here to call you.
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54 --
SPEAKER_04: You couldn't have a note to call me because I asked you to call me.
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55 --
SPEAKER_02: Shlobo Nix?
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56 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
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57 --
SPEAKER_02: That's my name.
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58 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
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59 --
SPEAKER_02: Hello.
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60 --
SPEAKER_04: Yes.
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61 --
SPEAKER_04: There you go.
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62 --
SPEAKER_04: That's the person you should be calling, I guess.
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63 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm sort of a phenom when it comes to cooking.
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64 --
SPEAKER_02: Am I in the right place?
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65 --
SPEAKER_04: No, I didn't call you.
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66 --
SPEAKER_04: So,
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67 --
SPEAKER_04: Somebody's screwing around with the phones, I think.
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68 --
SPEAKER_02: Is there some sort of flip that needs to happen?
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69 --
SPEAKER_04: I have no idea.
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70 --
SPEAKER_04: Somebody has managed to jerk the phone system around so that two or three people are called at the same time
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71 --
SPEAKER_04: and are told that they were calling somebody else, and it just, I wish I could explain it to you,
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72 --
SPEAKER_04: but somebody's having fun at our expense.
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73 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, what do you have to say about Zadaran's?
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74 --
SPEAKER_02: I don't know anything about it.
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75 --
SPEAKER_02: It's a spicy concoction that's full of character.
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76 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, I don't care.
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77 --
SPEAKER_02: It's real flavorful.
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78 --
SPEAKER_02: Hello, Salvadorian restaurant?
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79 --
SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
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80 --
SPEAKER_01: Hi, I need your hoyo, hoyo.
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81 --
SPEAKER_07: You need your place and order?
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82 --
SPEAKER_01: I want your hoia hoi.
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83 --
SPEAKER_07: My boyo yo.
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84 --
SPEAKER_01: I grab your hoyo.
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85 --
SPEAKER_07: Hi.
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86 --
SPEAKER_07: I did you do this over Franco, huh?
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87 --
SPEAKER_07: Tell me back when you're ready, okay?
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88 --
SPEAKER_01: This is Franco.
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89 --
SPEAKER_07: Frankl?
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90 --
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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91 --
SPEAKER_07: Okay, why would you like to order?
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92 --
SPEAKER_01: I want to touch your hoyo, hoya.
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93 --
SPEAKER_07: Okay, you're just joking around.
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94 --
SPEAKER_01: No, man.
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95 --
SPEAKER_08: Yeah, we don't have that thing.
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96 --
SPEAKER_08: You know what?
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97 --
SPEAKER_08: You just come over and look at the manual,
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98 --
SPEAKER_08: and point me in the mail,
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99 --
SPEAKER_08: and the menu, what were you right?
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100 --
SPEAKER_01: Why are you pulling my chain like this?
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101 --
SPEAKER_08: Where do I put you a chain?
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102 --
SPEAKER_01: Why would you do that?
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103 --
SPEAKER_01: Because I don't understand what you want, buddy.
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104 --
SPEAKER_01: Why don't you like it?
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105 --
SPEAKER_01: I need your hoyo ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-.
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106 --
SPEAKER_01: Hey, man, how much does it cost?
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107 --
SPEAKER_07: I don't know what you want.
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108 --
SPEAKER_01: To grab your hoyo, hoyo.
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109 --
SPEAKER_01: How much is it?
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110 --
SPEAKER_01: Okay, call me back when you're ready, buddy.
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111 --
SPEAKER_01: Do you have a liquid?
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112 --
SPEAKER_01: Okay, I'm busy, though.
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113 --
SPEAKER_01: I don't understand what you want.
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114 --
SPEAKER_01: I let you get take-out.
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115 --
SPEAKER_08: Dude, we're very busy, and you're just jerking around.
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116 --
SPEAKER_08: I don't have time for you, okay?
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117 --
SPEAKER_08: Give me what I want.
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118 --
SPEAKER_08: Don't go back again.
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119 --
SPEAKER_01: Tell me what I want to know.
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120 --
SPEAKER_01: Give me your hoyo, hoyo.
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121 --
SPEAKER_07: Hey, what can I do for you?
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122 --
SPEAKER_06: We'll give you my dick, motherfucker.
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123 --
SPEAKER_01: I want your hoyo.
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124 --
SPEAKER_06: Some more.
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125 --
SPEAKER_06: Motherfucker, okay?
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126 --
SPEAKER_06: You know, you must be a son of a bitch that's calling me at 971-2-7-6-28-9.
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127 --
SPEAKER_06: You're not a motherfucker.
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128 --
SPEAKER_06: You don't give your name the way you want.
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129 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'm calling from the United Negro College Fund.
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130 --
SPEAKER_02: Looking for a month.
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131 --
SPEAKER_06: Yeah, well, you can take him and fuck off Obama and kick him up to your ass.
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132 --
SPEAKER_06: I can.
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133 --
SPEAKER_06: Numbers show another of our police line here, so what the hell do you want?
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134 --
SPEAKER_02: What's the problem, my fella?
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135 --
SPEAKER_06: That's your number traced here.
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136 --
SPEAKER_06: 2133-0-9-5-8-4-9.
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137 --
SPEAKER_06: What the fuck you want?
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138 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm on a whoopee in the ass.
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139 --
SPEAKER_06: I'm got a good for you.
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140 --
SPEAKER_02: Yes, I'm looking to slap your mama for a rib.
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141 --
SPEAKER_06: I got your number, Trash, 9-7-1-2-7-7-6-8-2-9, you son of a bitch.
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142 --
SPEAKER_02: The hell you do.
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143 --
SPEAKER_06: Hello?
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144 --
SPEAKER_02: Hi, yeah.
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145 --
SPEAKER_02: to slap your mama for a rib.
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146 --
SPEAKER_06: You know, uh, you must be some son of a bitch and cock of a son of a bitch because I'm a
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147 --
SPEAKER_06: police reporter and we've got your goddamn fucking number.
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148 --
SPEAKER_02: Ah, must be.
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149 --
SPEAKER_06: Hi, dear.
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150 --
SPEAKER_02: Yes, sir. I'm just trying to slap your mama for a rib.
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151 --
SPEAKER_06: You know, uh, you must be one of those six son of a bitches.
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152 --
SPEAKER_06: You're airing your code now 213, 6179.6.1.6.7.
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153 --
SPEAKER_06: 6.1.8, I'm turning it over to the Harvard division.
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154 --
SPEAKER_02: Oh, it's so loud.
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155 --
SPEAKER_06: Your telephone number is retrace. What do you want?
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156 --
SPEAKER_02: I'm trying to get a hold of your mama's rib.
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157 --
SPEAKER_06: Yeah. Well, you're a sick motherfucker at 2133-0-0-0-085-9-9.
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158 --
SPEAKER_06: Day 49, cossucker.
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159 --
None: Hello.
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160 --
SPEAKER_02: Hey, uh, is this the place with all the chihuahuas?
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161 --
None: Yes, yes, it is.
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162 --
SPEAKER_02: Okay, yeah, I might be interested in those as a Christmas gift.
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163 --
SPEAKER_05: Sure.
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164 --
SPEAKER_05: They're all these excellent shape.
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165 --
SPEAKER_05: When I picked them up, because I picked them up a few years ago, I put them away.
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166 --
SPEAKER_05: I never had to displayed them at all.
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167 --
SPEAKER_05: So they're in excellent shape.
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168 --
SPEAKER_05: You can still push them and tell they talk and that kind of stuff.
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169 --
SPEAKER_02: What do they say?
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170 --
SPEAKER_05: There's a lot of things.
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171 --
None: It says different things.
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172 --
SPEAKER_05: The one that you remember, the one that says,
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173 --
None: here, kitty, kitty, kitty.
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174 --
None: He stopped into the lizard.
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175 --
None: Remember that one?
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176 --
None: Oh, sure.
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177 --
None: And then the other one is
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178 --
None: Christmas one.
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179 --
SPEAKER_05: Oh, there's a whole bunch of,
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180 --
SPEAKER_05: you know, they're 16 all together.
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181 --
SPEAKER_02: Tell you what?
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182 --
SPEAKER_02: Could you play one through the phone
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183 --
SPEAKER_02: just so I could hear one,
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184 --
SPEAKER_02: what it sounds like?
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185 --
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, hang on, one second.
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186 --
SPEAKER_05: Let me see if I can take them off.
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187 --
SPEAKER_05: I haven't put away because
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188 --
None: I knew for sure that I wasn't going
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189 --
None: to keep on, so.
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190 --
None: You know, but here's one.
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191 --
None: I don't know what it's.
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192 --
SPEAKER_05: But I'm going to put you right now, okay?
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193 --
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
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194 --
SPEAKER_05: Yo quito ban.
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195 --
SPEAKER_05: Oh, yo quiro taco bells.
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196 --
SPEAKER_05: You hear it?
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197 --
SPEAKER_05: Yo quiro taco bells.
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198 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
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199 --
SPEAKER_02: Can we hear another one?
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200 --
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, let me see.
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201 --
SPEAKER_05: This Christmas wants to see if this one works.
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202 --
SPEAKER_05: That's a Christmas one.
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203 --
SPEAKER_05: A couple of them don't see nothing anymore.
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204 --
SPEAKER_05: Here's one.
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205 --
SPEAKER_05: Oh, okay.
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206 --
SPEAKER_05: I'm not sure what he's saying.
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207 --
SPEAKER_05: Whatever you're supposed to be saying, you know?
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208 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
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209 --
SPEAKER_05: But anyway, there's 16 of them all together.
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210 --
None: Have a New Year, I'd be going.
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211 --
None: Have a New Year.
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212 --
SPEAKER_02: But anyway, that's what I got.
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213 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'd be interested in them.
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214 --
SPEAKER_02: Especially since the new Pope said that dogs go to heaven.
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215 --
SPEAKER_02: Did you hear about that at all?
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216 --
SPEAKER_02: You want me to do what now?
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217 --
SPEAKER_02: No, the Pope.
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218 --
SPEAKER_02: You know the Pope?
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219 --
None: Pope?
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220 --
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, the new Pope.
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221 --
SPEAKER_02: He just made an announcement that dogs go to heaven, which hasn't been said till now.
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222 --
SPEAKER_05: Oh, that's right.
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223 --
SPEAKER_05: That's right.
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224 --
SPEAKER_05: He did, didn't he.
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225 --
SPEAKER_05: See, I'm sorry.
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226 --
SPEAKER_05: I didn't hear you.
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227 --
None: You're absolutely right.
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228 --
SPEAKER_02: So I wanted to get these chihuahuas going.
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229 --
SPEAKER_02: Oh, okay.
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230 --
SPEAKER_02: And if you got one that talks about Gorlupas or Tostadas.
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231 --
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I've got one in there that says something about Gorbacas, I'm not sure what it is.
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232 --
SPEAKER_05: Oh, here.
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233 --
None: Hey, well, Gorbacca.
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234 --
SPEAKER_02: Huh?
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235 --
SPEAKER_05: I got to see, I haven't put away.
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236 --
SPEAKER_05: my room this way.
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237 --
SPEAKER_02: Hey, um, you know, I got a little bit of a toothache.
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238 --
SPEAKER_02: Uh, so if I bought all these from you, do you have any pain pills that you could maybe share with me?
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239 --
SPEAKER_05: No, I sure don't.
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240 --
SPEAKER_05: Absolutely not.
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241 --
SPEAKER_02: You got any rum or anything like that?
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242 --
SPEAKER_02: Oh, no, no.
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243 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, how about some Christmas cookies?
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244 --
SPEAKER_05: Uh, well, how would a Christmas cookie help your tea?
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245 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, I'd chew it on the other side of my mouth.
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246 --
None: Ha, ha, ha.
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247 --
SPEAKER_05: I don't even know what my wife has in the house. I'm not sure.
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248 --
SPEAKER_05: I would have to say no right now.
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249 --
SPEAKER_02: Maybe you, um.
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250 --
SPEAKER_02: want to go dancing, the three of us, you, your wife and I?
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251 --
SPEAKER_05: No, no, that's not going to happen at all.
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252 --
SPEAKER_05: If you want to buy the two hours or three or something for it, that's fine.
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253 --
SPEAKER_05: Otherwise, the conversation is over.
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254 --
SPEAKER_02: Are you sure you don't have any pain pills?
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255 --
SPEAKER_05: Absolutely, I don't.
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256 --
SPEAKER_02: Maybe in storage?
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257 --
SPEAKER_05: No, I don't think so. Thank you very much for your call. I appreciate it.
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258 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, hey, are you sure you don't want to go dancing, the three of us?
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259 --
SPEAKER_05: No, absolutely not.
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260 --
SPEAKER_02: Why?
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261 --
None: Because I don't.
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262 --
SPEAKER_02: Maybe this weekend. We don't have to do it now.
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263 --
SPEAKER_05: No, no. No.
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264 --
SPEAKER_05: I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't very social, so let's just forget this conversation and call it quick.
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265 --
SPEAKER_02: All right. Thank you.
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266 --
SPEAKER_02: Well, can I talk to your wife?
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267 --
SPEAKER_05: No, no, no, absolutely not.
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268 --
SPEAKER_02: Why not?
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269 --
None: Because that's it, no.
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270 --
SPEAKER_02: Oh, come on, just for a minute.
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271 --
SPEAKER_05: Bye-bye.