wallace-thrasher

Longmont Potion Castle 9 (2012)

Track 15: UPS Freakout 3

Last modified: 2025-02-14T11:41:50

Model used: distil-whisper/distil-large-v3

Speakers adjusted? false

Subtitles adjusted? false

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1 -- SPEAKER_00: Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Yes. This is Ray Ray at United Parsal Service.
2 -- SPEAKER_01: I'm on a long-distance phone call. You have a package for me now? Yes.
3 -- SPEAKER_01: Okay, once you bring it, I'll come down and pick it up because the elevator broke.
4 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, matter of fact, we were there last night, but you were way too loud last night. You didn't even hear the doorbell.
5 -- SPEAKER_01: I was not loud at all. I wouldn't even home. Much too loud.
6 -- SPEAKER_01: It wasn't me because I think I wasn't working. I wasn't working.
7 -- SPEAKER_01: That's nice. That wasn't me.
8 -- SPEAKER_00: This is UPS.
9 -- SPEAKER_03: You are from UPS, really?
10 -- SPEAKER_03: I was on a long-distance phone call when you called,
11 -- SPEAKER_03: and I have to call that person back.
12 -- SPEAKER_00: That's none of my affairs, sir.
13 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm going to call UPS to find out. What the heck is happening?
14 -- SPEAKER_00: I left detailed instructions on your door, and you just disregarded it, huh?
15 -- SPEAKER_03: That's not true. That's not true at all.
16 -- SPEAKER_03: Okay.
17 -- SPEAKER_00: and you guys are blasting noise out the door.
18 -- SPEAKER_00: Yo, hello!
19 -- SPEAKER_03: This guy keeps on calling me saying he's from UPS,
20 -- SPEAKER_03: and he's been at my door several times,
21 -- SPEAKER_03: and he didn't leave a flyer or anything,
22 -- SPEAKER_03: and then he was very rude to me and abrupt to me.
23 -- SPEAKER_03: He's a phony.
24 -- SPEAKER_03: He's a phony.
25 -- SPEAKER_03: He's a phony.
26 -- SPEAKER_03: He's very, very, very, right.
27 -- SPEAKER_03: You might.
28 -- SPEAKER_03: He might need to let the police know him.
29 -- SPEAKER_03: He might be just out of trying to rob me.
30 -- SPEAKER_00: Hello.
31 -- SPEAKER_00: Hi, this is Bri Bri-Bry, United Parcel Service.
32 -- SPEAKER_00: How you doing?
33 -- SPEAKER_00: What's up?
34 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, we're trying to get this parcel brought to you,
35 -- SPEAKER_00: and we tried yesterday too, but there was so much noise and sound coming out
36 -- SPEAKER_00: that we couldn't even get through.
37 -- SPEAKER_02: It's today, Tuesday, or what day is today?
38 -- SPEAKER_00: It's a bad day to be monkeying around with me.
39 -- SPEAKER_00: Okay.
40 -- SPEAKER_02: Okay. So who are you?
41 -- SPEAKER_02: And what are you calling about?
42 -- SPEAKER_00: Backing up on Bri with United Parcel Service.
43 -- SPEAKER_02: Yeah?
44 -- SPEAKER_00: And I need to know that you're going to quiet down a little bit so I can do my job tonight.
45 -- SPEAKER_02: Well, who's the parcel addressed to?
46 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm going to make one more attempt, and if I don't like what I hear and or see, I'm going to just leave the slip.
47 -- SPEAKER_02: Who is the parcel addressed to?
48 -- SPEAKER_00: I've already been out there twice, and you were way too loud to even hear me.
49 -- SPEAKER_02: Hey, do you want to deliver this parcel, or don't you?
50 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm going to try to.
51 -- SPEAKER_00: Alright, one more time.
52 -- SPEAKER_02: I think you're full of shit, and I think you should go to hell, and I think you shouldn't call here anymore.
53 -- SPEAKER_02: Fuck off, asshole.
54 -- SPEAKER_02: Hello?
55 -- SPEAKER_00: Hi, this is Ray Ray, United Parcel Service.
56 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
57 -- SPEAKER_00: And we got a parcel here for you.
58 -- SPEAKER_00: But listen, we were there last night trying to deliver this stuff, and you guys were making so much noise.
59 -- SPEAKER_00: No one even answered the doorbell.
60 -- SPEAKER_00: So...
61 -- SPEAKER_03: I was in my getting, I was in bed.
62 -- SPEAKER_00: Oh, I heard all kinds of them.
63 -- SPEAKER_00: Oh, way too loud.
64 -- SPEAKER_00: I need you to quiet down.
65 -- SPEAKER_03: Well, I'm not making any lies.
66 -- SPEAKER_03: Where?
67 -- SPEAKER_03: There's a television.
68 -- SPEAKER_03: I'll just turn it off the television.
69 -- SPEAKER_00: Go back and unplug it.
70 -- SPEAKER_03: No, it's off. You asked me to turn it off.
71 -- SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's off. Do you understand what that means?
72 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, keep it off, okay?
73 -- SPEAKER_03: Okay, well, what do you think I'm some package?
74 -- SPEAKER_00: Do you want this package, or don't you?
75 -- SPEAKER_03: Well, no, but I mean, you're not getting very nice.
76 -- SPEAKER_03: I didn't do anything wrong.
77 -- SPEAKER_03: Anyway, I'll shut up and wait for your delivery.
78 -- SPEAKER_00: Buddy, just shut up.
79 -- SPEAKER_00: and...
80 -- SPEAKER_03: Well, no, don't say that.
81 -- SPEAKER_03: That's not.
82 -- SPEAKER_03: Who are you with?
83 -- SPEAKER_00: UPS.
84 -- SPEAKER_00: Who?
85 -- SPEAKER_00: UPS.
86 -- SPEAKER_00: Why don't you listen up?
87 -- SPEAKER_00: This is the same problem we had last night.
88 -- SPEAKER_03: What do you mean the same problem?
89 -- SPEAKER_03: You didn't even see me last night?
90 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because you were making way, way, way too much noise.
91 -- SPEAKER_00: Okay?
92 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm driving a big, big truck.
93 -- SPEAKER_00: You can't miss it.
94 -- SPEAKER_00: And I got a three, four heavy boxes here.
95 -- SPEAKER_00: I need your help with.
96 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't bet I can't do.
97 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't get out of bed.
98 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, get up.
99 -- SPEAKER_00: I mean...
100 -- SPEAKER_03: No, sir.
101 -- SPEAKER_03: I can't get out of bed.
102 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm in bed.
103 -- SPEAKER_03: I have a restriction on my leg.
104 -- SPEAKER_00: Can't move.
105 -- SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're going to have a lot more restrictions.
106 -- SPEAKER_00: If I don't get this stuff delivered to nights.
107 -- SPEAKER_03: Really?
108 -- SPEAKER_03: Are you kidding?
109 -- SPEAKER_03: You know what I want you to do?
110 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't think I want the packages.
111 -- SPEAKER_03: I want to talk to your supervisor.
112 -- SPEAKER_03: How long does you fired?
113 -- SPEAKER_00: Fire?
114 -- SPEAKER_03: You know what I just said?
115 -- SPEAKER_03: Did you hear what I just said?
116 -- SPEAKER_03: Fired.
117 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't want to hear talk like that from anybody.
118 -- SPEAKER_03: You're a ridiculous person.
119 -- SPEAKER_00: I need a check drawn, and I need help carrying these frickin' things to your door.
120 -- SPEAKER_00: Period.
121 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, what do you expect me to do that?
122 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm commanding you to cut me a check here.
123 -- None: How much?
124 -- SPEAKER_00: $1,836.
125 -- None: Where is this from?
126 -- SPEAKER_00: It's from Tasmania.
127 -- SPEAKER_00: Okay?
128 -- SPEAKER_00: So pipe down, get up, get dressed, come to the door.
129 -- SPEAKER_00: No, sir.
130 -- SPEAKER_00: I want to meet you.
131 -- SPEAKER_03: I want to see you.
132 -- SPEAKER_00: I was already there twice.
133 -- SPEAKER_03: Sir, it's not my fault.
134 -- SPEAKER_03: Listen, why don't you just turn around?
135 -- SPEAKER_03: because I'm not going to deal with you.
136 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm going to deal with your supervisors.
137 -- SPEAKER_03: You're way lower
138 -- SPEAKER_03: than the class that they should have
139 -- SPEAKER_03: delivering packages in something.
140 -- SPEAKER_03: You shouldn't be working.
141 -- SPEAKER_03: You shouldn't be there if they're represented.
142 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm behind the steering wheel right now.
143 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, good for you.
144 -- SPEAKER_00: I want to check.
145 -- SPEAKER_00: I want you out of bed.
146 -- SPEAKER_03: No, I'm not giving you a damn...
147 -- SPEAKER_03: Give me your damn phone number and you're addressed.
148 -- SPEAKER_00: I want you to quiet down.
149 -- SPEAKER_03: Well, listen.
150 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm going to hang up on you in about a minister.
151 -- SPEAKER_00: Don't do that.
152 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't have a check.
153 -- SPEAKER_03: I can't get out of bed,
154 -- SPEAKER_03: and I certainly am going to come to you
155 -- SPEAKER_03: and pick up some kind of packages.
156 -- SPEAKER_03: There's what I just said.
157 -- SPEAKER_00: This stuff's from Tasmania, fella.
158 -- SPEAKER_03: Fellow, a month is Mr. Schultz.
159 -- SPEAKER_00: What are you, Tasmanian?
160 -- SPEAKER_03: No, not answer that question.
161 -- SPEAKER_00: Why?
162 -- SPEAKER_03: It's not your damn business.
163 -- SPEAKER_03: Why? You're too damn weird to talk to.
164 -- SPEAKER_03: any further. Now I'm going to hang up in about a second.
165 -- SPEAKER_00: Don't do that.
166 -- SPEAKER_03: No, I'm going to do that right now.
167 -- SPEAKER_00: Just turn your TV off, be quiet.
168 -- SPEAKER_03: And the TV's off.
169 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm going to hang up. This is one of the most extraordinary telephone calls
170 -- SPEAKER_03: I've ever had in my wife.
171 -- SPEAKER_03: You're the most despicable people.
172 -- SPEAKER_03: I have ever talked to.
173 -- SPEAKER_03: Now, you got that?
174 -- SPEAKER_03: You guys, turn it on and take your damn truck where you came from.
175 -- SPEAKER_03: Do not deliver this damn package to me.
176 -- SPEAKER_03: Because you're too.
177 -- SPEAKER_03: weird to do it, and I don't want to have it.
178 -- SPEAKER_03: So hang up, and you can say goodbye.
179 -- SPEAKER_03: And you call me, fellow, that's pretty weird.
180 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm hanging up now, so I'm hanging up now.
181 -- SPEAKER_03: So I'm going to hear you like two seconds.
182 -- SPEAKER_03: So let's just cut this phone call up right now.
183 -- SPEAKER_03: But, boy, you're going to be in some real trouble with your
184 -- SPEAKER_03: superiors and supervisory.
185 -- SPEAKER_03: In real trouble.
186 -- SPEAKER_03: You got it?
187 -- SPEAKER_00: We're going to ship you out to Tasmania, first thing in the morning.
188 -- SPEAKER_00: Hello?
189 -- SPEAKER_03: Hello?
190 -- SPEAKER_00: Hi, this is Sylvester, UPS.
191 -- SPEAKER_00: Hello?
192 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah, hello.
193 -- SPEAKER_00: Geez.
194 -- SPEAKER_04: Geez, well, tell me what you want.
195 -- SPEAKER_00: Well, pipe down for a second.
196 -- SPEAKER_00: We were there last night.
197 -- SPEAKER_00: There was way too much commotion coming out.
198 -- SPEAKER_00: No one even heard the bell.
199 -- SPEAKER_00: So we're going to just be shipping your parcel back, all right?
200 -- SPEAKER_00: I just want to let you know.
201 -- SPEAKER_04: We were home all last night.
202 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I know you were there because I was trying to deliver your box.
203 -- SPEAKER_04: What time did you try to deliver your box?
204 -- SPEAKER_00: All kinds of commotion coming out.
205 -- SPEAKER_04: Okay.
206 -- SPEAKER_04: Well, I tell you,
207 -- SPEAKER_04: what, why don't you just deliver it?
208 -- SPEAKER_04: I'll be here.
209 -- SPEAKER_00: No, it's a little late.
210 -- SPEAKER_00: I rang and rang and rang and rang the bell, and no one even bothered to answer it.
211 -- SPEAKER_00: So this thing is going back to the sender.
212 -- SPEAKER_04: Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, but we were here in the kitchen.
213 -- SPEAKER_04: So if you deliver, who are you delivering this to?
214 -- SPEAKER_04: Let's get that one straight first.
215 -- SPEAKER_00: And it says pedantic Luddite on there.
216 -- SPEAKER_04: I don't know who that is.
217 -- SPEAKER_04: Just tell me the name of the person you were trying to deliver it to.
218 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm Sylvester.
219 -- SPEAKER_04: I know, no, no.
220 -- SPEAKER_04: You're still not answering the.
221 -- SPEAKER_04: question. Who was the delivery to be made to?
222 -- SPEAKER_00: I have never heard so much noise and commotion like I heard of...
223 -- SPEAKER_04: Well, that doesn't make a damn bit of...
224 -- SPEAKER_04: That's not answering my question.
225 -- SPEAKER_04: Who was the delivery made too?
226 -- SPEAKER_00: I have never heard as much commotion as I heard last night.
227 -- SPEAKER_04: Then, you know what?
228 -- SPEAKER_04: Go ahead. Do what you've got to do. It's ridiculous.
229 -- SPEAKER_00: There was a huge uproar in there last night.
230 -- SPEAKER_04: Oh, for God's sake.
231 -- SPEAKER_04: Would you just tell me who you're delivering this to?
232 -- SPEAKER_04: We don't have anything to talk about.
233 -- SPEAKER_00: It was unlike anything I've heard before.
234 -- SPEAKER_04: Oh, you know how it's not.
235 -- SPEAKER_00: Hello? Hi, this is Malcolm at United Parcel Service. We have four parcels for delivery,
236 -- SPEAKER_00: but we came by last night and it was much, much too loud.
237 -- SPEAKER_00: Who are you calling? Who are you calling? I'm calling you, and we want to make sure you're going to be
238 -- SPEAKER_00: quiet before we come back there. I don't know what you're talking about, sir. I just want you
239 -- SPEAKER_00: know we're sending this package back to the sender. Okay, excuse me.
240 -- SPEAKER_03: You're caught in the wrong number.
241 -- SPEAKER_00: I need you to quiet down, okay?
242 -- SPEAKER_00: What are you talking about?
243 -- SPEAKER_00: I'm talking. We came out there last night and you were way too loud.
244 -- SPEAKER_03: You didn't, not talking about in my house, and I don't have no noise in my house tonight.
245 -- SPEAKER_00: Loudest thing I ever heard.
246 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
247 -- SPEAKER_00: Yeah, this is Spencer at UPS. I just want to tell you, we're sending this package back to the summer.
248 -- SPEAKER_03: Excuse me. Wait, and hold up. Excuse me.
249 -- SPEAKER_00: You were way too loud.
250 -- SPEAKER_03: Okay, wait, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, you're not calling the pension.
251 -- SPEAKER_03: I don't know what the first.
252 -- SPEAKER_03: You're trying to...
253 -- SPEAKER_03: Okay, if you're calm down.
254 -- SPEAKER_03: I'm not trying to holler at you. Okay.
255 -- SPEAKER_00: You better quiet down.
256 -- SPEAKER_03: Oh, fuck you, stupid motherfucker.